Sunday, April 11, 2010

Day Eleven of the First April Remembering

A list:

*the most servant hearted man alive is my husband. This man amazes me all the time. When he's not pissing me off :)
*Azaelia bushes, gifts from precious friends (Debbie and Renee.... you guys bless me all the time). They told me that they wanted to give us something that would bloom every year around April and would remind us of the beauty of Ben's short life here. Oh wow. How fantastic.
*Friends who volunteer their sons to help plant the bushes-- thank you Bryan! :)
*American flags
*Grey paint, white trim, soon-to-be black shutters.
*my father and my father-in-law: helped Don paint the house-- they were alternately in heaven and agony. It was a perfect week. Rained one day. Perfect spring break.
*Rocking chairs.
*being southern. Thank you Lord. :)
*Paige's plant expertise
*Friends with interviews at cool colleges (if you think of it, throw up a prayer for my friend J. He'd be fantastic at this position and deserves a BREAK!)
*Dinner outside with new friends
*Crickets
*friends who share cuttings from their yards (dear Delynn!!!! Thank you!!!!) and share their hearts, too.
*White linens. Not the perfume. Actual linens :)
*Clotheslines
*Tea
*Our families
*the squeeky front door

There's so much more-- our jobs, our schools, our kids at school, our precious friends...

I'm remembering that I miss Ben, but that my life is still tremendously full. Nothing, no one, can replace him, but this is still a good, good life. I still have so many complicated longings in my heart and the ache is always, always there, right at the surface of my chest, and I could cry at any moment, but I'm happy. We're happy.

3 comments:

Susan Boone said...

I love to read these words from you, sweet Sam.

Samantha said...

hey dear friend-- every time i think of the week coming up (for both of us), these are the words that come to mind: "Duck!! Here it comes!!!"

:) hope all is well on your side of town! i think of you often!

Holli said...

Samantha...a beautiful post from a beautiful person. You are an inspiration.